The things people say to fat people

fat girl problemsI’ve had a lot of really harsh comments about my weight over the years. I’ve had people shout out to me that I’m fat just while I’m walking down the street, I was bullied at school for being overweight and I’ve been asked if I’m pregnant… three times (three worst experiences of my life, I reckon). Thankfully, this hasn’t happened in a while but there are still people out there who say things, most of the time meaning well, that are really, really offensive.

Some of these are from my own experience and others are ones that seem to keep cropping up on the ‘What skinny people say’ thread on a weight loss forum I frequent.

These jeans are a size 18, I’m not a size 18. Ew
– I don’t bother to point out that I was a size 18 for a long time.

You just need to eat less and move more
– Yes, probably but I think it’s a bit more complicated than that. (I will in future refer people to the very detailed information my nutritionist gave me on why it’s not as simple as this.)

You should do Atkins
– I’d love to except it’s difficult to maintain, bad for your cholesterol and I LOVE potatoes

I’m so fat, I really need to lose weight
– Said by someone thinner and fitter than me in my presence. If you need to lose weight then I must be disgusting.

Do you really need to lose three more stone?
– Yes. 10 stone is not a dangerously low weight, you know.

*Insert comment about larger people*, no offence Jess.
– This one still happens. I really think he means no offence, but still.

Oh you have such a beautiful face
– Pity about the rest of me, right?

Don’t lose your curves
– This warrants a whole other blog post of rage

All your health issues are down to your weight
– Said by a medical professional

The term ‘real women’ when used to refer to people who are curvy/normal/overweight annoys me for a number of reasons too. (But, again, that’s another blog post).

Disclaimer – This is, in part, a joke. I think people can be offensive without meaning to be. I also think there are some genuinely cruel people out there. However, I also think that people (me included) are far too sensitive and should just take stuff like this on the chin and move on. Maybe even use it as motivation.

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  1. It’s really difficult, I’ve had a lot of these arguments with my sister who is very slim. I used to get SO angry when she went on about needing to lose weight and tone up, until my Mum and Husband sat me down and said that I need to stop taking everything so personally. Yes, I’m overweight, yes, I have massive body issues and yes, I’m very sensitive, but everyone has their own hang ups, be they slim, fat or anything in between, and they are entitled to have just as many hang ups as me. We’re all human.

    As it turns out, my sister is probably even more desperately unhappy with her body than me as she’s nineteen and completely flat chested. My mum and I are ridiculously well-endowed in the breasticle area and lil’ sis had to grow up in the shadows of our boobs. She’s now desperate to have a boob job and has never had sex with her boyfriend or let him see her naked. Just goes to show, you can’t often have it all.

  2. I hate when people tell me Im built big “oh you are just big boned”. no, im overweight. but thank you. and telling me i have a pretty face..ugh.. its the worst. I think people mean well by it but its like “at least you have a pretty face so you’re not a total waste of a human”. i hate it.

  3. When such comments are delivered in a deliberately in a hurtful way, yeah, they hurt. What I don’t get is when I make some kind of self-deprecating joke about my OWN weight, and people spring to defend me. Especially when they say things like “yeah, but you’re tall, and broad-boned, so you’re well-balanced” or “you’re just big-built, it’s how you’re made”. Well, yeah, I AM tall and broad naturally, but I’m also overweight. There is absolutely no denying this. And I actually find the above behaviour offensive, because they’re treating the joke like it’s the most insulting thing in the world which, in turn, implies that being fat is the worst thing in the world. And the fact that I came out with the joke myself makes them think that I must hate myself when I say such things, which I don’t. Not by a long shot.
    That’s a big peeve of mine. As for strangers who randomly call you fat for no other reason than they’re tosspots, there’s always the standard “I can lose weight, but you’ll always be a fucktard”.

  4. I used to really hate it when in the middle of working my arse off to lose weight certain individuals would tell me that I would actually look ill if I lost any more (bear in mind I was still 2 stone over weight at the time). It was demoralising and made me feel that they simply wanted me to stay unhappy. Unsurprising, 3 stone lighter/later I don’t look ill, I am fitter, healthier, happier and so pleased I didn’t listen to them xx

  5. It is funny how people try to be polite and sensitive but end up insulting such in the case on comments on weight. I am used to this kind of awkward moments and I try to look unaffected. Anyway, I am currently on the process of decreasing my weight. I am doing this for myself so that I could be more confident as well as healthy.

  6. I can relate to this topic because I want to lose some weight a lot of my friends always telling that I am really fat..

  7. A lot of people seem to do this. I’ve only met one person who has ever looked ill from losing too much weight and that was probably more down to the fact that she was under a lot of stress at the time. However, I didn’t tell her so!

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